Okay, I created a new account. However, when I tried to login, I got a blue screen with this message:

"The User Profile Service failed the sign-in. User profile cannot be loaded."

So I can't...

I also cannot create a new profile or sign in with my Microsoft account instead. These options do absolutely nothing when pressed. The blue loading circle comes up, but nothing ever opens...

My start menu will not work in Windows 10.

Cortana/Search also doesn't work. When I click it, it does nothing.
If I right click on my search bar, I see a bunch of options like "Disk...