New
#11
In reviewing this, I guess I gave you the cause, but not a solution. My solution for me is that I don't use icons on the desktop at all. In fact, I auto-hide my Taskbar to the left as well. If I want to see it > WinKey/T. Just the desktop background is all I want to see. I tried to adopt to the mouse back in W98 and again in W7, but I disliked it. It slows me down navigating. Most people won't believe that, but it's true. One just needs to use key combos. The only time I'm forced to use the mouse is in a browser.
You added a question. It's necessary if one uses a keyboard to navigate with. If the icon or tile doesn't highlight, no one will/can see what's in focus, yes? A modern OS must appease four types of users concerning navigation > Keyboard, touch, mouse, and voice.
I see Edwin and Computer Chicken gave solution. I gave you mine. Perhaps someone else may have another. With that said, I'll press Alt/S.