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#1171
The Great Squirrel Caper
The other day while I was working outside, I started in the front door to get something to drink. Gracie the great squirrel tracker was dancing around and whining, so I told her to show me . . . which she did!
She took me to the end of the front porch and pointed her nose up into the far corner where a half-grown gray squirrel was clinging to the top bricks. Uh oh! So, I went inside to get my water, told Gracie to come on in, and we went out the back door. I clipped her 25 ft. “string” which she loves onto her collar and took her out the back gate with me. Later when I looked, the squirrel had seemingly escaped. Good.
Fast forward to the end of the day. Lucy was nowhere to be found and the minute Gracie hit the back door, she knew we had an invader! She put her tracker nose into gear and started the hunt! Immediately, I knew Lucy had left me a present; a live one this time.
As Gracie tracked, I followed her with a flashlight. Found! Sticking out from beneath the end of the couch was a little fuzzy gray tail . . . Oops! The squirrel! Damn Cat! Or not! I had left the doors open to air the house out in the nice Spring weather, so maybe it came into the house instead of going down the steps? Anyway, Lucy got credit for The Great Squirrel Caper!
I called Cyndi and told her the stupid cat had caught a squirrel and let it loose in the house! So, Cyndi came down with a discarded pool que (to try to guide it out from underneath or behind things). By the time I called Cyndi, though, I’d dismantled half the living room trying to catch the silly thing!
What followed is almost indescribable! Towels gotten out to throw over it. Gracie’s blanket to throw over it. Here it is! There it went! I found it; it’s over here now! Damn Cat! You’re the one brought the Damn Cat to me! Gracie and Lucy were now in my bedroom so they couldn’t interfere.
By this time the living room was completely dismantled; the couch pulled away from the wall and the hide-a-bed opened all the way up, mattress pulled off, coffee table all the way across the room, recliners turned upside down to be sure there was no critter inside, end tables pulled out, highboy pulled away from the wall, table pulled out, and both the front and back doors open.
After about a thousand more tries to capture the Damn Squirrel, both Cyndi and I were exhausted. I found the Damn Squirrel behind the standing clock, tried for it and missed . . . again! Dammit! Damn Cat! Damn Squirrel!
Once, Cyndi found it in the hall bathroom, and as she tried to get inside so she could capture the Damn Squirrel, it slipped past her and was on the run again! Sh, errr, ummm, crap!
At this point, we pretty much gave up. Cyndi said we had three options; it went out the front door, it went out the back door, or it was still in the house! Gee thanks, Daughter! So, Cyndi went home, and I let Gracie and the Damn Cat out of the bedroom.
Gracie immediately started tracking again! Oh, damn, that squirrel has been all over the living room, dining room, kitchen, hall and bathroom. Gracie homed in on the bathroom once more, and started to whine, but I knew it wasn’t in there, so I proceeded to open the door so she could check it out and know it was gone.
Not so fast! I did close the bathroom door anyway. Gracie tracked everywhere there was to track, and finally told me, “Here’s that Damn Squirrel, Mama! It was behind the extra package of T-Paper, so I grabbed the hand towel off the rack, reached down very gently (it was facing away from me), covered it with the towel and clamped down with my fingers! That Damn Squirrel wasn’t getting away again! Caught! Finally!
I called Cyndi and the first thing she said was, “Don’t you dare tell me you caught that Damn Squirrel!
I took the Damn Squirrel out the back door and pitched it over the back fence!
Gracie loves babies and has been pouting since night before last, because she can’t find the baby! I think she wanted to keep it. If it had been a kitten or puppy, maybe . . . but not no Damn Squirrel!
Forecast weather for Thursday is not good.
State offices close ahead of Thrusday’s predicted weather
Good morning Keith ... its 32° outside this morning, with a chance of showers later tonight.